Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Career Opportunities

The average job: paper-pushing, deskbound, punctuated by meetings with people you loathe... in fact pretty much the only time in your life that you're forced into close, conversational proximity with a variety of other people, regardless of your feelings about them, on a daily basis. Mana from heaven, you would think, for a bit of comedy gold.

And so last night BBC2 had The Grumpy Guide to... Work. I've never seen one of these 'grumpy guides' before but I figured it had to be good - universal recognition of the subject matter, targets like fish in a barrel (corporate guff, internet dossing, meetings about meetings, sickies, office parties etc), British satire being the best in the world...

But no, it was a pile of cack. I'm not suggesting that being a music journalist/DJ (Stuart Maconie) isn't a real job; nor that being a TV review journalist (Kathryn Flett) isn't a real job, nor that being a... er... whatever Laurence Llewellyn Bowen does isn't a real job; nor being a stage actor (Nigel Havers) or a stand-up (Steve Punt). But, at the same time, what do any of these know about the sort of work the vast majority of us do; i.e. work that doesn't put you on the telly or on the radio?

So instead of getting those knowing 'YES' moments when it feels like you're in on the best of in-jokes, and instead of hearing the killer lines I could rob to entertain my colleagues, all I did was sit there and think 'you don't have a f#cking notion, do you? You twat' as thespian Nigel sat and tried to be funny about email and as Laurence quipped about something or other and as Stuart tried to be witty about meetings.

I should do my own show for BBC2. I'd call it The Grumpy Guide to... No-Mark Celebs Being Lined Up to be Unfunny About Stuff They Clearly Know Nothing About for a Half-Hour of Cheap-Ass Telly. It'd be class.
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