Monday, January 02, 2006

Fast Cars

One of my New Year's resolutions is to stop cursing, at least out loud. I thought America would sort me out but, if anything, I got worse there. The main reason I'm so bad is that I worked in a Dundalk bar from the age of 13 and was thus exposed to the effing and blinding of hardened drinkers deep in to the night.

So this morning I got off to a very bad start. I was driving to work wrecked tired (like I've done each morning over the weekend) when some Cork chav bastard decided to blaze past me across double white lines on a bend doing at least 75 (I was doing 60-odd). I didn't even see the prick coming but I got a good look at his modified Japanese import shit-heap - all tinted windows, body kit and lowered suspension.

Being nasty when I want to be, I immediately wished him a good smash that would involve him totalling his car and, hopefully, losing a limb or two. Then my sensibilities kicked in. What if he has a partner and a child? What if he's actually gifted in some way and the world would suffer?! Why should any more families experience the pain of losing someone in Ireland's never-ending road carnage?

Then I thought screw that. I hope he wraps that fucking thing around a lamp-post and ends up in excruciating pain. Little fucker. Ok, I'll stop cursing as of....

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now.
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